Month: January 2015

Je ne pas suis Charlie

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religion / writing

I have a friend; her name is Charlie. No, sorry, his name is Charlie. Their name is Charlie. You know what? All of my friends are Charlie. They aren’t John and Mary and Emily any more, they are one amalgamation of many many Charlies: left-wing, right-wing, centrist friends of mine have all outed themselves as a secret Charlie-all-along this last week. They did so by putting a hashtag (#) followed by ‘jesuischarlie’ after, well, anything […]

Michael and the Fish

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writing

What do you call fish with no eyes? Fsh. Onwards… They pressed their noses to the glass. “Fish!” said the child, delightedly. “That’s right,” said Miss Potts encouragingly, “they’re fish.” “Fish!” said Michael again, moved to speech at the sight of a bright orange specimen which flicked its tail at him and disappeared behind the ruined castle. Miss Potts often brought Michael to the school’s fishtank. He would stand still, for a good three minutes […]

Time to say goodbye…

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writing

Another character assassination! This was the first unpleasant person I created. Enjoy… That’s it darling, look at mummy and smile! Sweetie, you’ll be fine, just fine. Mummy and daddy are very proud of you, aren’t we, and we can’t wait to hear all about your new adventures at university! Graham, for god’s sake, she doesn’t want that bloody teddy – you’re going to make new friends darling, and they don’t want to see your silly […]

Speech

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writing

This is a piece on character I did for my short course, and I just found it. Hope you enjoy it. Shh, thank you, thanks, shh please. Well, I’ve always known this day would come: the day I say goodbye to my innocent unworldly young girl, and instead say hel-lo to a beautiful confident woman – still young though, I hasten to add! Though the clock is ticking darling – you got in there just in time, Simon! […]

Out with the old, in with the new (year)…

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all about me

I am writing this in 2015, which still scarily sounds like The Future. I will be 31 this year, and have lived my life almost exactly half and half in the 20th and 21st centuries. Just gimme another year. And so my thoughts turn to resolutions and my lack every year thereof. When I was in the Priory, one of my resolutions was to ‘try something new each day’. This was then revised to ‘each […]